Lessons from Papi: Self-Love through Celebration

Have you heard of “treat yourself” or #SelfcareSaturday?

This newfound phenomenon is considered a millennial activity, one of over indulging oneself because you are ‘worth it’ and life is too short to be suffering all the time.

However, my father, who is in his mid-eighties always was an advocate of treating himself right and celebrating all the little things.

 

What do I mean by “self-love through celebration”?

My father celebrates all the regular holidays, as well as, the ‘hidden holidays’ that could be found on the calendar. Here are a few that I can list:

  • March 30th, it’s National Doctor’s Day

  • April 20th, it’s his birthday.

  • June 17th, Saint Manuel’s day

  • November 4th, Saint Carlos’ day

While most of us in the digital age celebrate these hidden holidays by posting a cute gif or perhaps a funny meme on social media, my father will go above and beyond to celebrate. He’ll purchase a nice card from a supermarket and write a message to his future self, then he’ll mail it to his office so it could get to him just in time for the holiday.

He expects his children to remember these holidays and to wish him a ‘happy fill-in-the-blank day’, as well as, get together for a family dinner to commemorate.

When he was a bit younger, depending on the holiday, he would do something extra on certain holidays like purchase himself either roses or chocolates for Valentines Day.

These small actions were (and still are) considered ‘silly’ by most of my relatives, but I adore it. These actions are ways that he’s able to celebrate and smile even as he’s getting older. These holidays keep him young and give him something to look forward to.

It’s why I want to growl at anyone who wants to take away his seemingly silly traditions of sending cards to himself. If no one will, then what else will he look forward to? More bills in the mail? No thank you.  


Examples of self-love

While I do understand that celebrating multiple holidays around the year may be considered costly (or silly) for that matter, I still think we all could learn from my dad who treats himself right when the rest of the world won’t.

Every week I paint my nails.

While it’s not much, I do appreciate being able to treat myself to a manicure and even look forward to painting my nails a fresh new color every week. Sometimes I’ll even plan what color or design I’ll do. It’s a small treat I give myself and brings me joy.

I schedule emails to myself.

My primary reason would be to remind myself to do something, but in the email I’ll make sure to address the email to ‘Future Carla’ and add some cute motivational things so that if I’m having a bad day, that email will at least make me crack a smile.

In a recent video from The Financial Diet, they did a video about ways to self-love yourself that were less about indulging and more about ‘self-parenting’. In a way they described a kind of ‘tough love’ for yourself such as making yourself go to sleep earlier for your own sake, or drinking that extra glass of water even though you really want to #treatyourself and get a soda from the fridge.

There’s so many creative and yes, cheap, ways that you can incorporate a bit more of self-love into your life. These changes can bring you a lot more smiles and make you feel special when the rest of the world is trying to beat you down.

Importance of celebration

The second reason why I love, love, love that my father celebrates these ‘hidden holidays’ is because it gives the family an ‘excuse’ to see each other. Tonight for example, instead of staying home, I got dressed and went out to dinner with my father who I haven’t seen for a bit over two weeks. I even saw one of my sisters who I haven’t seen for months (besides the random Facebook post here and there).

My family members can laugh and mock my father all they want, but these ‘silly’ events are what brings us together.

In 2019 I’ve had deaths of two individuals who were close to me. One of them being one of my dear friends in the beginning of the year, and the other was my cat who I had owned for nineteen years. It’s heartbreaking if I let my thoughts dwell too long on them, but it also gives me a more powerful newfound appreciation for the people who are in my life.

Life is too short to not celebrate.

If celebrating some ‘Saint’s Day’ is going to make everyone clear their busy schedule to have dinner together, then call me crazy. I’d rather be crazy than not see my loved ones when all of our schedules are all over the place.


Ideas to celebrate your life today

There are websites that you can find ‘hidden holidays’ to start incorporating into your life. One of the ones I’ve celebrated for the past couple of years is Pi Day which is on March 14th. I tend to go out with friends and get pizza, or anything round really.

Otherwise, you can plan a reoccurring monthly event where you do a potluck with your loved ones. Or perhaps something less complicated, like with my weekly board game night with my friends. It’s less of a holiday, and more of a tradition, but it still gives you a reason to change up your daily routine and have something to look forward to.

Or you can do the solitary thing and pick a day in the week in which you do something loving towards yourself. Whether this means painting your nails, preparing a cucumber infused pitcher of water, or writing a cute letter/email to yourself. It’s honestly up to you.


What do you do to love yourself?  

Regardless of what you decide to do with this information. Learn something from my father and love yourself. Make sure that you treat yourself right, especially if no one else will step up and do it for you. While it’s great when someone does something special for you, they are not required to.

You can treat yourself because you deserve it. It’s your life, and in a way, it’s your job to love and take care of yourself.

It’s one of the many reasons why I admire my father and adore the fact that he’s quirky and strange. It’s what keeps him young and makes him special.

 

If I missed out on other ways to love yourself or ways to incorporate more ‘celebrations’ in your life, please let me know!